Looking at things differently, is a healthy exercise if we want to be empathetic, rational and more compassionate. However, shifting perspective is not merely about seeing things from the point of view of others. We can gain greater insights and gain deeper happiness.
An up-side of gaining a new perspective is that it increases happiness levels. If your focus is on something that you perceive to be negative in your life and you come at it from a different angle, then you can feel better about it. It’s called reframing.
Next time you have to go to a party, and you’re just not feeling, try using the « What I like about this » technique. Before you even leave the house you are grumbling you don’t know anyone there, or dreading being seated next to so-and-so and it has put you in a grumpy mood, and now it’s tainting your partners mood and it’s looking like it will be a bad night. If you apply the « what I like about it » technique on the way there, you might just find your mood shifting.
You might say « What I like about it, is that I get to wear this new dress, or that I have been wanting to try this restaurant. What I like about it, is that it’s a night out. What I like about it, is the opportunity to tell my funny story..etc. It doesn’t take away the problem, but you can shift your mood from pessimism to optimism fairly quickly.
Another reframing technique is to watch for « I have to » words in your day and change them to « I get to » . Consider saying « I get to walk the dogs » instead of having to, and see how quickly you catch their excitement as you are all getting ready. Or, « I get to do a workout » ( because you get to listen to some great music while you do, and know how good you will feel after 20 minutes) … « l get to make dinner. « Your perspective changes because your brain immediately starts thinking about the perks and benefits of walking the dogs or making dinner.
Hère are some other tips to help change your perspective that gets you on course to change your life.
- Change something small, like taking a different route to work or to daycare. Simple, but it allows your mind to be open to other possibilities.
- If dealing with difficult people, consider the challenges they are facing, the problems they are trying to solve. It makes you more empathetic, and you may find yourself trying to figure out the solution together, and it eases tension.
- React differently to someone’s account of the same old story. Shift your perspective like it’s the first time you heard it, or respond with a smile, and a nod when your typical reaction has been to engage and argue.
And last but not least, my three go-to pieces of advice, that I give all the time because it never fails. These three things apply to every situation, and it never hurts, and usually helps.
- Drink water
- Meditate
- Journal
Take time to clear your mind, listen to the wind in the trees and rush a little less. It can help you to gain insights into what’s most important. By changing your perspective on your life you can change the course of it and find greater joy.
Journal prompt for the day: Today, I get to……
Today’s intention for meditation : To pause before responding in conversation and lead with empathy and love.
Good reflections. Your time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.